Oreo Ready for the Monsoon Season?

The change in the temperature into rainy, monsoon season has spelt a season of increased pain for me.  It's been ridiculously difficult to do anything without pain and it's a whole new experience learning to work around this.

Like how do you eat if you cannot use chopsticks anymore or grip a knife?  Chasing food around with a spoon is amusing for the first 5 minutes, after which it just becomes pathetic.  And I would laugh at how I keep missing my mouth when trying to eat, except I am too hungry and frustrated.  But enough of the whinging ... perhaps, because of my increased disability, the craving to do becomes greater. Just do.  Anything.  

Unfortunately, the "do" seems to be baking recently. What would normally take 2-3 hours becomes a whole day event for me now. And after that, it takes me about 1-2 weeks to recover from the exertion.  Which is why I did not post as much recently.

The cause?  Oreos.

A friend had brought over some Oreos, which I really appreciated since I was developing a severe sweets craving and no one had thought to bring me any, and I was loathed to ask for fear of seeming ungrateful.  Also, I had forgotten what a comfort food Oreos are.  Especially with a cold glass of milk.  The only thing better is mac n cheese but you don't have to cook Oreos or milk!

So, there I was chomping on my Oreos when I suddenly wondered if I should make some Oreos cupcake. I surfed the Web for a painless recipe and came across this recipe from Handle the Heat.  When I realised it was originally a Martha Stewart recipe, I was almost surprised since it is remarkably simple from the Queen of Let's Complicate and Patronise Things.

I got to hand it to Martha though, she recognises a good recipe when she sees it and claims it as her own ... this is a fabulous recipe.  And I am not even a fan of cookies and cream ice cream or dough normally.   I am now a convert but perhaps it is only applicable if the cookies used are Oreos.  I might test this out one of these days and replicate using another type of cookies and see if I am still a convert.

Anyway, I made this in pretty short time, which was amazing since I was in some pain that day.  The most painful and time-consuming part was the creaming of the cream cheese.  Everything else was easy peasy.  

Unlike most everyone who made this recipe, I did not use paper muffin cups because of the "cute" Oreos imprint at the bottom.  I was more concerned about the taste and was not fussed. Also, I wanted to have an easy washing-up so I turned to my trusty silicon muffin cups. 

Oh, I reduced the ingredient enough to make 6 cheesecupcakes (I so dub them ... heh!) since it's just for me.  And also because I just so happen to have only 6 silicon muffin cups.  LOL.

Oreos Cheesecupcakes

9 Oreos

1/2 lb cream cheese

1/4 cup sugar

1/4 tsp vanilla essence

1 egg, beaten

1/4 cup sour cream (I made this by adding about 1 tsp of vinegar to whipping cream and leaving it for about 5-8 mins to thicken but if you have the real thing go for it)

1 pinch of salt

1.  Preheat your oven to 180/190 deg Celsius.  As mentioned before, mine thinks it's Linda Blair so I had to twiddle between the two temperatures

2.  Beat the cream cheese till smooth - boy, this nearly killed me as I did this by hand since my mixer is kaput

3.  Add the sugar gradually, continuing to whisk, then add the vanilla essence

4.  Add the sour cream and mix well together

5.  Chop 3 Oreos up.  I chopped mine into chunky bits but you can make them a little finer, just not into "dirt" since that would be such a waste of Oreos!

6.  Place an Oreo at the bottom of the muffin cup.  If you are using paper muffin cups for the imprint effect, go check out Handle the Heat or Martha Stewart's website for the instructions.  It's dead simple.

7.  Spoon the batter into the muffin cups till almost full.  Mine were pretty damn full

8.  Bake and rotate the tin around midway so they can bake evenly, for 25 minutes or so.  Again, check around the 20-min mark on the doneness.  If the centre is wobbling madly, you are going to need to go another 5 minutes.  If it jiggles only a little, you are done

9.  Cool on the rack (ouch), then refrigerate to firm it up. I refrigerated mine for about 2 hours before I caved and had one.  The rest I kept in an airtight container in the cups to maintain the shape.  I think if you are using the paper muffins, you might need to refrigerate them in the muffin cup tin.  Again, another benefit of silicon cups.

So there you have it.  A cheesecupcake so easy even a partial cripple can make it.

And it is delicious.  Wonderfully smooth and rich yet not cloying.  This is one cheesecupcake I will be making again.  And again.

No pictures as I was in too much pain at the end.

Job Well Done

No pun intended.

Dear Mr Job, I wish you a good journey and thank you for the memories.  You might not know this but Apple was my first introduction to computer technology.  Before that I did not even know a TV from a computer monitor.  

I was a "pure arts" student and of the old school too. Which meant we did this with our hands and not through tools like computers.  Ironic, eh?

Back then, my computer technology virginity was taken by a Classic II.  Woah, that takes us waaaaaay back.  Back when screens are monochrome.  It was grey screen then.  I had seen a the green one but I was given the "latest" so it was a Classic II for me.

My first technology client was also Apple. 

Dear Sir, you guys opened the way for me into the world of technology and I thank you.  I could not have had a better introduction and it paved a fairly successful career into that world.  Back then, I would not have expected it since I was a fine arts student who could barely work a typewriter.

Years passed and I was dragged kicking and screaming into the PC world.  I had to shoulder the weight of guilty betrayal and although I successfully masked my disdain, my heart was always with that little alleged fruit of Eden.

Even though I could no longer be touted a Mac user, in my heart I was still a die-hard Mac devotee.  So imgaine my horror when you guys succumbed to the other evil M.

I swear I never forgave you.  I understood why.  But the little art graduate geek was screaming in horror inside.

Thank you for the memories.  You might be ever lauded as the man who guided Apple into the age of glory when it revolutionised the way we compute and made PC users confused about the difference between them and us.

Honestly, I disagree but who am I?  I think you guided Apple into an age of commercial glory but somewhere along the way, the band of almost anarchistic creatives who led the way of true artistic and IT revolution were ... well, lost.

You were truly a genius but somehow I missed the old Apple.  But still I thank you because you gave me the most joy in working for a very long time.  In the insanity of the IT world, you were my beacon.  When I retired from the biz, I ran back to you guys with the breathless anticipation of a school-girl returned home for hols.

Instead, I found a Mac I did not recognise anymore.  And my beloved Mac was now more a mobile phone than my little arty security blanket.

I never got any of your i-whatevers.  I would rather hang on to my Classic II.

Which I miss dearly.  Just as you, Sir, will be missed.  For you were just as classic and the world will never be the same.

I pity your successors.  Already they have been scrambling and I wish that was not so.  Because your legacy is too precious and you worked too hard for them to fail you.  Essentially, you worked yourself to the grave and to many, your legacy may be a tiny handheld tool.  To me, the legacy was a culture and an identity.  I freaking loved being part of them and am glad I had more than a decade of that, even if it no longer exists.  

 I wish you a safe rest of the journey, dear Sir and thank you again.  See you on the other side.  And I promise not to harangue you for selling out.

The Accidental Gangster & The Mistaken Courtesan: A Review

I had problems sleeping last night so I decided to watch a movie.  Something light and easy that I could switch off in case I got sleepy again and go back to bed.

The Accidental Gangster & The Mistaken Courtesan - image attributed to http://www.moovidadb.com/movies/72774

At no point, while watching this movie, did I feel sleepy.  I have not enjoyed a movie this much in a while.  Not that I have been watching crap, mind you, but this movie was so feel-good, life-affirming, funny, and good-natured that watching it was a pleasure.

The plot is fairly simplistic but written in such a straight-forward, humorous way that is held up by a fantastic cast of actors and actresses, wonderful camera-work, art direction and direction.  The script writing was not innovative but wonderfully clever in some parts with a huge lean towards the comic.

It starts with the opening credits and right off the bat you know this is no saeguk.  No, no ... it's a saeguk fusion.  And how do we know?  Because Lee Jung Jae sports an almost padam hair-do and clothes distinctly modern in their I-am-the-hood cluelessness.  And the music is Korean hip-hop at its most unapologetic gleefulness.  In fact, the music kinda reminded me of Hong Gil Dong.  The Hong sisters' version.

Image attributed to www.hancinema.net/korean_movie_The_Accidental_Gangster_and_the_Mistaken_Courtesan-picture_73090.html?sort=Most_Popular_Pictures

Also right off the bat is the realisation that I am gonna like this movie.  Because the director is so obviously a fan of Frank Miller.  The opening credits were reminiscent of Sin City's comic-strip treatment.  

But what catches you from the very beginning is Lee Jung Jae.  How much did he enjoy making this movie?  I suspect a whole lot because he plays his role with such glee and OTT affection that you get pulled right along with him, right till the very end.  His goofy grin, the pained grimaces, the cocky bravado, the daft incomprehension, the good-natured sheepishness ... well, you laugh out loud at and with him.  Truly I think this movie worked half as well due to him alone.  The other half is shared with the other cast members and the crew.

Lee Jung Jae with padam hair & the actor next to him is a brilliant comedian who plays Chilgap in this movie

So, our hero is a bungling wannabe gangster in the old Joseon period.  When?  I dunno and am not arsed to check, really.  It matters not as the story works in any period. We see our man, Thunder (sic), in a fight which he initially seems to be winning.  Till he catches sight of a beauteous gisaeng on horseback, passing by.  And just like that, our man loses his mojo.  And gets trampled just as he caught the almost admiring eye of the gisaeng.  Who promptly looks away in disdain when he's thrown to the ground.  

We find out that the gisaeng is sent to a run-down drinking house, known as Bright Moon, to be a serving girl and what's funny is the granny who runs the place.  The couriers delivering the gisaeng get beaten to a pulp for late delivery (if only we can do the same to Fedex or DHL) and flee, leaving the gisaeng rather at a lost.  But she's cool under pressure even when the place turns out to hell on earth and she's run off her feet.

And then we see Thunder return to the drinking house for it appears he's related to the granny. Maybe she really is his granny but I dunno since I speak next to no Korean and the subtitles are good but not that good!  He promptly makes a fool of himself over the gisaeng who is still disdainful.

And then we have the ubiquitously moonlight seduction scene.  Where he tries to seduce her and she takes off her stinky socks in his face.  Ah, romance ...

He dubs her Dishy and the subtitles here are brilliant that there is nothing lost in translation!  He's rather unsuccessful with his courtship but he tries so hard.  And come a couple of days later (or so it appears) when he returns home to find the place trashed and granny all angry & upset that the couriers had delivered the wrong gisaeng to the wrong establishment.  Apparently, there was also a Bright Moon in the Pil district where Dishy was supposed to go. So they'd returned to do the rightful swap and Dishy was now a pale-faced, shrill but loudly cheerful older chick called Hong Jae.

To say Thunder felt let down is an understatement.  And so he spends a good few minutes of screen time moping.

Then one day, a few, well-dressed men come a-visiting.  I got all excited-like when I noticed one of them is a favourite actor in Korean movies and drama.  I do not know his name but he is excellent as both villain and good-guy roles.  Fabulously funny and a good actor although he is too unattractive to ever play any lead roles.  Which is a pity, because I think he would just kill it.

Anyway, the leader, makes some comments about the drinking-house's suitability as a grave and that finally bestirs the snoozing Thunder into ... well, thundering ...

The leader challenges him to a fight and it is then we realise he's one of the top, dreaded gangsters in the land.  His name is Odd Ears, which leads the eye immediately to his ears, which seem fine to me but might have some other significance in Korea.  *Big shrug here*

Odd Ears ups the ante by declaring that he would hand over Yangjoo if he loses the fight but that Thunder should risk everything he owned.  Our man, Thunder, is too daft to realise the danger he is in and goes knee deep into the fight.  It is right here we are reminded again of how much the director likes Frank Miller.  The fight scene has a 300-ish feel to it but it's still OK.  

Image attributed to http://asiancinefest.blogspot.com/2010/05/acf-570-korean-movie-night-accidental.html

To everyone's eternal shock, Thunder wins the fight with a well-placed punch, sending Odd Ears into a "temporary 10-year coma" and making Thunder the official, new boss of the Mapo district.  Oooh boy.

Thunder would have none of it and tries on numeral occasions to make a break for it, especially when he is informed by newly acquired right-hand man, Chilgap (played by the actor I like!), that he has to attend the national congress of gangster.  Hilarious.  That is until he finds out that the congress is instigated by one Mandeuk, who happened to have killed 187 men at a go, single-handedly.  And who also decided to hold said congress in a place called Bright Moon.  In the Pil district.

Dink!

Suddenly, our man Thunder is all ready to go.  But he still puts up occasional signs of struggle when common sense rears its rare head.  There's a brilliant scene of this that utilises CG in the most clever and inoffensive way.  Much like Heroes.

So off we go to Bright Moon, where we meet the gangsta bosses for the first time.  They are hilariously threatening and pissed off with the camera as if they are caught by the paparazzi.  I loved this montage and was laughing out loud enough to wake the neighbours.  Thunder and Chilgap enter late and we go through some predictable fish-out-of-water scenes from Thunder.  And then we meet Mandeuk.  Who looks like a shoujo character on crack.  Wait ... nevermind.  Anyway, we notice right off that he's got a bitch on a leash ...and it's Dishy, who's channeling Mi sil in Queen Seondeok. 

Thunder is all awww, I'm so love-struck again, which does not go un-noticed.  Thunder must not have been present the day subtlety was being rationed out.  Anyway, Thunder, as expected, pisses off Mandeuk big-time when he forgets to call him by his preferred moniker of Big Gun and addresses him as Mandeuk.  Fear ripples through the crowd but Mandeuk goes all I'm-scarier-when-I-pretend-to-be-forgiving and starts wrangling for the role of uber Boss, citing a transparent excuse of unity against the authorities who are out to get them.

Not everyone is convinced and Thunder hammers in the point by asking what's in for him and demanding Dishy as a bribe.  This does not go well and we then have a totally unnecessary but still beautifully executed "artistic" scene of Dishy dancing and painting.  I just have one question ... how come the ink only spreads to about an inch up her white, silken shoes and does not seep further?

Dishy's rendition of Memoirs of a Geisha.  Image attributed to http://www.hancinema.net/korean_movie_The_Accidental_Gangster_and_the_Mistaken_Courtesan-picture_73085.html?sort=Most_Popular_Pictures

A fight almost ensues due to the heightened passions that arise from such a titillating display (right, porn has nothing on scenes of women painting with their shoes .. or maybe it does ... *eyebrow raised*).  Chilgap hastily drags Thunder away and asks if he's out for an all-out war.

Suffice to say the movie now carries on with the bid for world domination from Mandeuk, aided by a scurrilous corrupt minister while Thunder learns what gang loyalty really means, while following on his seduction bid of a recalcitrant Dishy.

There's a brilliantly funny sequence of him breaking into Bright Moon and incurring the wrath of all and sundry - except Dishy who fakes it and then softens when he hands her a comb he bought for her.  The escape scene is my fave ... how cool and funny was his "cut-out" and subsequent "fall out"?  Love the CG there.

Chipgap is understandably worried about his new boss.  He likes the dude but the obsession with a gisaeng is downright dangerous.  To bribe Thunder into trying to be a proper master criminal, he offers to help Thunder get to see Dishy.  And what follows is a scene so funny I cracked up like a hyena through it all.  Suffice to say, I will never look at maps the same way and expanding view has taken on a whole new side(s).  *Cackle*

After schedule reading, comes map reading.  There should be a best acting by a body award.  LOL.

We get to see Thunder in the only traditional attire in the movie when he impersonates a libertine to catch Dishy on a boat trip.  And we realise (as does he) that Dishy might just fancy the oaf.  We also get to see him displaying some honour and loyalty which gets his men to really fall in love him whereas before they just liked the dumb log.

There is also the huge battle of the gangstas scene where three of the gangster bosses most supportive of Mandeuk decide to call Thunder out.  At first, Thunder is slightly disturbed to see their combined forces and his ... lack of forces.  Till Chilgap coolly states that they are the Yangjoo gang ... and out comes their gang members.  Whose numbers equal the combined forces of the three rival boss.

So they huddle and bleat out the terms of engagement.  No weapons, no hitting of the head, no spitting, no cursing ... wait, one of them objects.  No cursing is just too much and Chilgap digs in his heels till Thunder declares that it is pushing it.  For some reason, that struck me as totally hilarious.

The fight is all out but fun and Thunder prevails, even after wounding himself with an ill-conceived punch to the noggins of the gangster boss called Big Head.  A time-out is called and while everyone is recovering, one of Thunder's man comes crying that it's all been a decoy as men with swords have gone after Odd Ears.  Thunder thunders off to the rescue after hurling words of angry disdain on the three bosses.

He arrives in time (although granny had a handle on things) and again, a fight breaks out which he wins.  Suffice to say, Mandeuk and his evil court official are not pleased and that night Mandeuk goes all Charlie Sheen with the gisaengs and again threatens Dishy.

Flying Daggers anyone?  Image attributed to http://www.nautiljon.com/asian_movies/the+accidental+gangster+-+the+mistaken+courtesan.html

And here's another nod to a film classic.  A run through a bamboo forest, firstly between two trysting lovers, and then from a horde of murderous assassins.  I half expected to see flying daggers spear through the air.  We never quite learn how Mandeuk found out about Dishy's secret missive to Thunder to meet in the bamboo forest so she can warn him that Mandeuk has gathered the top swordsmen in the land to do him in.  Oh, maybe it is understood that she was followed?  'Cos the relaying of the secret missive wasn't so ...secretive, ya know?  Broad daylight with no disguise in a busy market.  Why didn't you just mark the spot with an X while you were at it?

Anyway, Thunder gets beaten to a pulp again by the assassins.  Except they cheated by using swords!  Gasp!  Thunder did!  And here is where we get told that in the gangster world it is OK to fight with fists but not with weapons.  Essentially Thunder gets sliced and diced and Dishy tries to protect him but to no avail except to give us another nod to another movie gem.  Gladiator.  It's not as surreally beautiful but still evocative as we see Thunder roll off his protective stance over Dishy and her gobsmacked but lovely face gets a slow-mo close-up.

From here, the movie goes almost a meg-speed.  Dishy begs for mercy, offering herself in exchange for Thunder's life.  Thunder gets strung up literally.  Mandeuk's gang starts killing off Thunder's gang and the other mob bosses.  Chilgap tries to protect Odd Ears from Mandeuk's crocodile tears and gets pummelled.  He is made to surrender all the Yangjoo gang's assets to Mandeuk and begs for Thunder's body for a proper burial.

Which does not happen as the hero cannot die, can he?  So we get the revival scene where Thunder begs for forgiveness and promises to return everything as before, prompting the recently disbanded gang members to un-disband and throw back their severance pay in support. 

We then get a wedding scene.  Which is notable for one hilarious thing.  The Andre costumes.  I totally lost it when I saw the bride and groom's costumes.  I had seen these in one his catwalks and though, now those would only work in a movie like Bram Stoker's Dracula or The Cell.  And here they were.  Meta funny.

Andre's bride & groom.  Too funny.  Images attributed to www.hancinema.net/korean_movie_The_Accidental_Gangster_and_the_Mistaken_Courtesan-picture_73090.html?sort=Most_Popular_Pictures

Thunder's gang (including all the villagers) make their way to crash the wedding with Thunder looking all Rain-like with a hoodie and the Japanese flag on one thigh.  The soundtrack is fab here and really lends to the mood.  And we're at the wedding and a fight ensues.

Except now the mysterious stranger who had been plaguing Thunder by beating his ass and then appearing in odd moments to offer unwanted advice, turns out to the the prince.  Who is on a secret mission to capture the corrupt minister for colluding with gangsters.  A fact he is hard put to dispute since he is attending the big boss' wedding, was offered dips on the bride and there's the poster advertising the fight between Mandeuk and Thunder. Princey gets settled in next to the doomed minister and declares he's looking forward to the fight so Evil, Corrupt Court Carrion should pronounce that it is to be a fair fight mano-un-mano.  As his fate hangs on the outcome.  If Mandeuk wins, he gets off scot-free.  If Thunder wins, he gets the gallows.

Odd but he was rather hasty in making the announcement that no one should aid either in the fight.  To say Mandeuk is surprised is again, an understatement.

Now comes the one moment of overkill.  I love 300 with every bit of my blood-thirsty, art-loving soul but the reference in the fight scene between Mandeul and Thunder was just too much.  And too long.  The director and CG crew went over-board with the 300 tribute and this scene was strung out too long, making it slightly gauche in execution.

Luckily, for the movie, Lee Jung Jae's charm and acting chops alleviated the slight awkwardness here and we are able to go to the happy ending ... well, happily.  All's well when Thunder wins the day.  And the girl.  Who gives us a bit of a surprise right at the end.  But not really as I could see that coming not even 1/3 into the movie.

And it all ends on a high and cute note with the end credits.  Which are funny and worth staying back for if you are watching it in a cinema.

So all in all this was an excellent movie. Funny, charming, straight-forward, great acting, brilliant timing with very few detractions except for the excessive tribute and reliance on some movie greats.  Still definitely worth a watch, and a few revisits on down days.  

I give this movie no remote clicks to fast forward to end, mute or eject disc.  Instead I give it 4 thumbs up for a thunderous good time.

Where Did I Park My Brains?

Obviously I am still sleepy.

I had my telly on and was just going to switch it off when I noticed that it was Martha Stewart.  Which made the search for the remote more determined.  Then a scene flashed to a building with a large "Park" sign on the first floor of a building.

And I wondered what kind of Korean establishment it was before I realised.  Ha!  

Back to bed for sleepy muddle-heads.

I Dream of Pajeon

Do you dream of food?  I do. All the time.  Also of a lot of things but they are all in technicolour.  Someone once told me everyone dreams in black & white.  I think it may be my ex-husband so obviously that's bull-shit right off the bat.

I can see things in colour, smell things and even taste things in my dreams.  And most of the time I remember them vividly.

So, I just dreamt of pajeon.  

Would you believe I did not have Korean food till I was in my early 20s?  Of course, it was the ubiquitous Korean barbeque and of poor quality too.  So for years I was not fond of bulgogi or kimchi and avoided Korean food.  Then I met a Korean friend.

She must have been the first authentic Korean I had ever met.  Notice I say authentic Korean because I met a couple of American Koreans who were more American than George Bush. Both of them.  They could not speak Korean and did not even think they were Asian in any way.  So needless to say they were hardly ambassadors for converting me.

But my friend N was a born and bred Korean.  She was the one who introduced me to Korean cosmetics and food.  Both of which I am eternally grateful for.  It was during one of my visits to her house that I tasted pajeon for the first time.  Also soju which I never developed a real fondness for although I partook a lot during those visits, which explains why we became such fond friends. Hic.

Anyway, she told me she was not a good cook, unlike me, but she would prepare a couple of snacks.  And thus, I learnt what Koreans mean when they refer to "a couple of snack", which equates to banchan, which to me is like a 10-course Chinese banquet.  Ah, Koreans ... masters of understatement.

I gorged myself on the wonderfully tasty snacks she made.  There were so many but pajeon made an impression on me.  It was similar to the Chinese scallion pancakes but just ... more!  Crispy yet soft and spongy and the taste was so much more evocative and memorable.  She made a simple scallion pancake a masterpiece for the palette.  There were also a corn and a green bean versions which were a little strange to me as they seemed undecided between being sweet or savoury snacks.  Another winner was the kimchi pajeon.

From N, I developed an enduring love for kimchi.  Real kimchi.  Which I later learnt was a much debated topic due to the proliferation of varieties.  There are as many types of kimchi as there are provinces in Korea. But I believe what constitutes as "real kimchi" to a person is the first, unforgettable bite of kimchi.  If you tasted kimchi using oysters, you are gonna regard that as "real kimchi."   Anything else without it is going to fall short.  Likewise, if you are used to really fermented kimchi, any fresher variety is going to be labeled as "fake".  So, one's definition of authentic is really based on personal experience and provenance.

Anyway, I cannot really tell where my definition of real kimchi comes from since I never really learnt which part of Koran N was from.  Unfortunately I lost contact with her but certainly not my love of many things Korean.

Anyway, back to pajeon.  There is a Japanese equivalent which is just as good but something about pajeon just pulls me back in.  I still crave for N's seafood pajeon which was phenomenal.  She always made it DIY.  In other words, like a buffet but with the batter all ready so we can mix up our choice of ingredients and gather around a giant electric skillet as we fried our way to heaven.  She would make some as "samples" so we would not come up with concoctions that were too bizarre but we were an international group made up of some seriously disturbed individuals ... no prizes for guessing who ... twitch, twitch ...

These sessions were always fuelled with giggles, soju and other alcoholic beverages.  Which explains the giggles.  And there would always be the latest Korean series or music video, imported from Korea via N's family and friends, playing in the background.  We lived for the days when the care packs arrived!

Years down the road, I have eaten a number of pajeons but somehow none quite compare.  Firstly, because not many commercial establishments serve seafood pajeons with oysters.  Secondly, most commercial establishments charge you an arm and a leg for the few seafood they add to the pajeons.

I am going to make my own seafood pajeons this weekend.  Since I dreamt of it, it must be a sign.  It will probably be a simple one.  I have some oysters meat and shrimp in the freezer.  No spring onions or leeks which is a darn shame but I do not think I am well enough to venture out to get some and my usual care pack friend is away.  So I will make do with the few vegetables I have.  And I have kimchi!  Woo hoo!  Joy!

So back to bed and tomorrow is another day ... pajeons ahead!

Gooey Cinnamon Walnut Mini Rolls

The weekend is coming.  Weekends are good and bad news for me.

Good news because I can get to eat food not catered by the tingkat service which brings me sustenance every weekday.  I say "sustenance" because the food they bring me are such.  Sometimes they can qualify as real food but as these occasions number about 6 times among 20, so it is not a promising declaration.

I separate my intake between "sustenance" and food.  "Sustenance" is for the so-called food which keeps me alive but have not much to recommend themselves otherwise.  This is not a malicious pigeon-holing as sustenance is much under-rated.  You realise its importance when you are bed-ridden, unable to seek it and go for days essentially starving until someone checks on you and brings you some.

Food is for the rest which have some level of taste, texture, and presentation which brings you some degree of pleasure and joy.

On weekends, I am free to seek food.  That's the good news.

The bad news is that this expedition is a double-edged sword as I can indulge my soul with real food but am hampered by both my inability to move much and my limited finances.  So I have to be creative.  As I cannot always depend on the kindness of others.

One of the ways I try to keep my culinary sanity is to bake something on a Friday so I have some "real food" for when I feel peckish on the weekends.  Fortunately my appetite is quite small (but frequent!  And subject to strange cravings at odd times!).

Today I decided to make something "bready" which is quite a surprise even to me since I have never baked any breads before.  I am more a cakes and puddings kind of person.  Perhaps I was inspired to do so as I watch aghast at how fast the loaf of bread my friend had brought me was developing mould.  Egads, I barely had it 3 days when the green discs of death with auras of white decay started spotting the hapless white bread.

It's the humidity in Singapore which fast tracks everything along to its doom.  I could make some relevant social commentary here but I am sure the government monitors everything (including blogs of no account) so I am not taking any chances.  Thank you very much, Lee family.

I was always rather ambiguous about the much-loved cinnabons that Asians seem to adore.  Or rather they adored till something new came along.  Singaporeans are amazing foodies and are always quick and willing to adopt the latest food craze.  But their culinary curiosity also mean they move on to the next fad very quickly.  At one point, you would find the ubiquitous swirls of chewy bread oozing caramel yumminess everywhere, now they are little gems you actually have to seek out.

While I like the cinnabons, I find them a tad boring.  Sure they are good but they cannot sustain my interest for too long.  Perhaps I am more Singaporean than I thought!  I find myself wondering how much more interesting it would be if you added walnuts or dried fruit or played around with the bread. And I am not too keen on the raisins too.

So there I was, surfing for yet another recipe which I can miniaturise and bake in my muffin cups when I came across a recipe for cinnamon buns in a muffin tin.  Woah ... that's me, I thought.  Come to mama, I bookmarked with glee.

Firstly, I would like to thank Fuki Mama for her recipe.  I actually tested out the recipe the previous night but with some tweaks of my own, which were derived from Steamy Kitchen.  I was not sure which I should attempt so I decided to make a batch of the master dough and try out a variety of techniques.

Last night, I made the "dry" version of the cinnamon buns a la Fuji Mama.  I shall not go into details except that I rolled, cut, baked 6 pieces and ate them all.  They were nice but not excellent so I made a mental note to try out her original recipe some day before relegating the recipe to the "tried once, keeping for reference but no desire to repeat" folder.  They were a little too dry for my liking so I decided a gooey, wetter recipe was called for.

The master dough idea is brilliant as you can keep and re-use it for a variety of results.  I kept mine in a rather haphazard way which I am sure will induce some serious cooks to berate me soundly.  I stuck the darn thing in a ceramic bowl, flung some cling wrap over the top and left it in my fridge.  Ha!  I really like Steamy Kitchen's recipe as she is so detailed but she just seemed a little too hung up on some things which made me rush through her post and copy down the essential stuff without subjecting myself to the strait jacket experience.

So be warned if things go awry.  Sorry Ms Hair.

So here goes today's messing around with buns of cinnamon.

Sinning with Cinnamon-Walnut Buns of Stealth

Master dough (small serving):

1 tsp & a healthy pinch of instant yeast (because I was going to use it for muffin cups so I did not want it ballooning up like the Michelin Man - if using it for other purposes, you can increase it to 1 1/2 tsp I guess)

1/4 cup sugar

1/2 cup lukewarm milk (just zap it in the microwave but do not boil then just leave it to cool to lukewarm temp)

1 egg

50g melted butter (again, zap it in the microwave and leave to cool)

1/2 tsp salt

2 1/4 cup flour ( I admit I cheated.  I did not use it all.  I think I used about 2 cups and a bit and once I eyeballed the dough to be be soft yet firm enough I stopped.  WTH does that mean?  It means I wanted a soft, fluffy bread that's not too hard and chewy as it's gonna be a lil bit in the muffin cup.  But if you are using it in a pan, you can make it firmer. What's it look like?  It's spongy and soft and does not stick to your fingers but moist.  It keeps better in the fridge to my reckoning.  I could be wrong but it worked out the way I wanted so who cares? I don't ...)

Topping (much like an upside down cake - yes, you see the connection now, doncha?):

1/2 cup caster sugar

50g softened butter

1/2 tsp ground cinnamon

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

6 walnut pieces

(I also added a bit of the extra cinnamon-sugar walnut mixture from the filling)

Filling (super yummy):

30g softened butter

2 tbsp sugar

1/2 tsp ground cinnamon

4 tsp chopped walnuts

Pinch of black pepper

(OK, Steamy Kitchen's recipe called for pecans but I didn't have any so I used walnuts.  Also she added a pinch of nutmeg but I forgot.  Anyway, it was fab even without.  I think I may ask this filling to marry me ...)

1.  OK, this recipe takes some planning and doing ahead so it is unlike me to undertake it but I reckon it's worth the effort.  The night(mare) before Cinnamon, dissolve the yeast and 2 tbsp sugar in the lukewarm milk.  It's instant so it'll be ... instant ...

2.  Mix together the egg, butter, salt and another 2 tbsp sugar

3.  Add the flour to make the dough.  I add a 1/4 cupful a time so I can control the development of the dough.  When it reaches the stage I like, I stop adding flour regardless of what the recipe tells me.  Why?  Because there are so many variables to all the other ingredients that you gotta eyeball things but also because I trust myself ... ha!  It's ready when you do not have any loose flour bits and the dough does not stick to your fingers.  If you make mistakes, don't panic.  If it is too dry, add some more lukewarm milk.  If it is too wet, add more flour.  Just have fun.  Oh, I also like to use my hands instead of a mixer.  One, because my mixer is kaput.  Two, because my hands are partially crippled so it is a pleasure to handle things with them when I can

4.  Now that the dough is a nice, squishy ball, I leave it in the bowl in my kitchen ('cos it's rather hot in there) with a cloth over the bowl to keep away the insects and whatnots and also to maintain the moisture.  Make sure your bowl is ready for this as this dough is gonna be expand and it wouldn't do for the bowl to literally have its cup runneth over

5.  Go do something else for about 2 hours.  Till the dough is almost twice its size.  Mine was more like 1 1/2 it size but it was OK for me since I was gonna be using it for a few more times and the humidity is my house would revive even the most slothful yeast

6.  Now you can use some of the dough or refrigerate it for later use.  Which is what I did.

7.  The morning after, take your now sadly deflated dough out of the fridge.  All that nice, lively, bouncy growth would have been inhibited by the icy retreat in your fridge so you have to prod it alive again.  I wet my hands so the dough does not stick and to allow it to be soft and moist.  Cut out a grapefruit-sized amount of dough and pat it into a ball shape with your wet hands.  Whack it onto a glass or ceramic plate (whatever you can scrape the dough off later easily) and stretch it from bottom up into the center like you are doing origami.  Ya know?  Like when you are making a paper rose?

8.  Turn it upside down so the smooth side is facing up.  Cover it with a cloth and let it rest to do its Lazarus thing for about 10 mins.  Can be longer, whatever makes you happy

9.  In the meantime, make either the topping or the filling.  It's up to you.  I made the filling first, which turned out to be a lucky stroke.  I'll explain why shortly.  I used some of the sugar and cinnamon to form a dry mixture with the chopped walnuts.  Why?  Dunno ... just felt like it

Cream the rest of the sugar and butter with the ground cinnamon and black pepper.  You can add nutmeg too although I forgot

10.  Go back to your dough.  It should have grown much like many men once they hit thirty-five.  Lightly flour your work surface and a little of your rolling pin.  You can afford to be a little more generous with your flour if you have worked out a soft, moist dough like mine.  If not, you might wanna go easy on the flour

Roll out your dough into a rectangle about 12" x 22" ... eh, how many of you (aside from Martha Stewart) actually bake with a ruler by your side?  Yeah, that's what I thought.  If you answered in the affirmative, I pity you.  If your dough is about the size (it's OK if it is odd-shaped, just chill, OK?) of half your forearm length and the about 1 1/2 - 2x the breadth of your palm, you're there.  Assuming you are normal-sized and not the missing link ...

I like mine a little thinner than 3/4 cm.  Again, back away with the ruler.  Just eyeball, OK?  If you like a bready bun, make it thicker.  If you like it with more layered swirls, make it thinner but not so thin you can see through it.  If you can, it's too thin, godammit!

11.  Now butter the dough liberally (that means reeeeal thick-like) with your creamy filling.  Try not to eat it all before this stage.  Do not be too greedy and butter all the way to the edge as it makes it a bitch to roll up later.  And the "ends" make great little snacks - more on those later.  Then sprinkle the walnut mixture over

12.  Roll that baby up.  Like a swiss roll 'cept there's no parchment paper to do that with ... hey,  now's there's a thought!  But anyway, just roll it up a bit at a time till it's a long roll.  See mine?  It looks a little ... er ... suggestive, no?  I have a dirty mind?  Like you didn't think the same ... pffttt.

No jokes about bar mitzvahs and the like, please

I let it rest while I make the topping.

13.  Cream all the ingredients for the topping.  I added some leftover walnut cinnamon sugar and whooey, that elevated this filling a treat!  Sometimes I do stuff I do not even comprehend but I just follow my instincts and they work.  Thanks, God, you're the man.

14.  So, I use silicon muffin cups.  They are dead easy to use and wash up. I adore them.  Also, I believe in recycling and much as I think some paper muffin cups are cute, the thought of such wasteful behaviour from me does not sit well.  Silicon bakeware may cost more but they are a much better long-term investment and really, the trees will thank you.

Anyway, pompous pontification over, let's now lock and load.  Firstly, preheat the ole oven.  I like to "over-heat" my oven first, then lower it to the "right temperature" when I put the goodies in to bake.  Why?  Dunno but my stuff always seem to come out better when I do.  So it's 190 deg C for preheat.

15.  Spoon over the topping into each muffin cup.  If you are not gonna use the silicon cups, just make sure to grease your muffin pan or wash up is gonna be a real pain.  Pick up the cups and plonk them into the tin to kinda level them.  Place a walnut piece in the centre

Again, it looks kinda of suggestive but from the opposite spectrum ... is this what they call food porn?

16.  Now cut the "cinnamon log" into 1 1/2 inch slices.  Again, back off with the ruler.  Really.  Come on!  Someone said it's dead easy if you use dental floss but I only have flossers so I made do with a knife.  Just flour the blade a little between cuts to make it s little easier.  Next time I am gonna get me some dental floss!  Anyway, I managed to get about 8 pieces from my log.  I trim the ends where there is not a lot of the filling and set these aside (they're gonna become snacks!)

17.  Place each slice into each muffin cup.  Cover them with a cloth and rest for about 30 mins.  I forgot as I got caught up watching X-Factor (there's a horrid fascination to this enterprise) and it was 45 mins for me.  But it's all good as they grew nicely.  See the difference after 45 mins!

Before.  Don't they look like roses?  So purty ...

After.  They look more like Roseanne Barr now ... no offense.

Bake in the oven at 180 deg C for about 18-10 mins.  OK, here's the drill.  I set my oven to 15 mins because my oven is possessed.  It never does what I expect so I tend to check on it for its Linda Blair impersonations before the time is up.  So at 10 mins, I check, saw that my buns looked mighty anaemic so I added another 5 mins to the timer.

At 15 mins, I check again and realised they looked nicely golden brown and another 5 mins might be over-kill.  So I watched for 3 mins and decided they were done.  So 18 mins for mine.  Sort yours out on your own

I upturned the lower left corner bun to show how cute the walnut garnish looks.  Kawaiiiiii!

18.  Remove and immediately upturn.  If you wait for it to cool, you are gonna get pralines for toppings so upturn while hot. Gingerly.  With oven mitts.  And a prayer.

So now you have yummy, gooey cinnamon walnut mini buns.  I tell you these beauts are dangerous.  They are so easy to inhale that you can finish the lot at a go.  With a glass of cold milk.  I had to restrain myself when I had wolfed down half of them so I could save some for breakfast tomorrow.

I started with two.  Then another two ...

And those ends?  You can bake them.  I cut them into small marble-sized bits and then placed them onto the same muffin cups still holding the dredges of caramel topping.  Roll them around to coat them in every little bit of sugary goodness and bake them for about 10 mins.  Check them - when they are golden brown, they are ready.  I also baked a couple as is and ... and this is the cool part ... ate them with some leftover curry for supper. Sooooooo good!  I wish I had more ends!  Am gonna make more later and try them out with my chilli prawns.  If I had chilli crabs, I would use these too!

You can pack away the buns in an air-tight container and refrigerate them for a couple of days (if they can last so long!).  Then let them defrost at room temperature and give them a quick zap in the microwave to soften the "praline"so they revert back to caramel toppings.

I stand by my moist dough for this recipe because (OK, the photos are shite but it's the best I can do with my dubious grip and my crappy mobile phone camera ... handling a camera in my condition is more than I can manage right now so suck it up) the bread is soft and fluffy.  If you like it chewy, use more flour and perhaps one with higher protein level.

So, I very happy with my experiment and will probably make more in the future but now, all that exertion has tired me out.  So it's painkillers and predisnone and all its happy mates for me before I go to bed.  But happily go I for I know what I'm having for breakfast tomorrow!